The Little Black Book

2006-04-28T01:56:14Z

An addendum to the previous entry. Written slowly, as if deep in thought, in Thalassian.

I was right. Alkan left me tonight.

Naiama came by. I had hope... precious hope! for the briefest moment... but instead she pushed into my hands her journal. It's a small black leather tome with brown parchment pages. I clutched it in my hands tightly enough that the blood fled my fingers, as she told me that... that it was time for her second life to begin.

I suppose this meant that her first life... her life with me... is ended forever. I suppose all the times Alkan tried to practically beat it into me that Naiama was dead, he was right.... ~~Was it I, then, that killed her?~~ Is the woman I loved dead, now? Gone forever? Is there any trace remaining?

After she departed I left the journal on a table and went for a long walk, which took me all the way into Astranaar and back. It hurt to look at it, and hurt more to even think about opening it.

I still haven't.

Three Hard Lessons

2006-04-28T01:16:49Z

Thalassian, again. Back to the shimmer-black ink.

Alkan, a Vizier? He is not even trying anymore... he has turned from me as surely as has Naiama... he tells me nothing new. Nothing I did not already know. He demands I bare my soul to him, that he may better advise me... and then gives me no new advice! But no matter... he wants out. He's "reached his limit" or something... I have learned some things these last couple days, hard lessons neither Naiama nor Alkan, I am sure, had any deliberate intention of teaching.

1. Oaths are useless. Nobody holds to them any longer than convenient.
2. There is no love for me. Perhaps I am incapable of love.
3. Sooner or later, I lose everyone I care about.

I don't understand... he says she still loves me... but she would not listen, not to a single word...

Journal of the Lady Nightstone

The Little Black Book

Three Hard Lessons